Tuesday, July 27, 2010

A home for tumbleweeds

It's been a veritable desert on this blog, eh? I can almost see the pixelated tumbleweeds, hear the deafening roar of silence.

I suppose I put the blog on hold because, in many ways, I've been in a holding pattern. Life, not so much. She is charging ahead, riding the slippery rails of time. In the past several months, Becca turned 3. The Banker got a new job. We escaped to Colorado to celebrate our 8th anniversary. Becca finally got in to a great (and previously booked) preschool down the street. So many wonderful things clicking into place after so long. That is, except for the one thing that I struggle to keep from overwhelming me altogether. I kept thinking, "With this month's treatment, surely there will be success. And then I can post something triumphant." Then nothing. And it's a heat-rending, soul-sucking, obliterating nothing to endure. Repeatedly. For 2 years.

So we're changing things up. We've "fired" our local doctor and been accepted at a clinic in Denver nationally renowned for fighting infertility. Tired of putting life on hold, we were stupid and got a new puppy. We're shopping for antiques, making improvements to the house. I attended a writer's conference, and while I still don't have the time or wherewithal to write a novel, I have a much firmer grasp on the process...not to mention a load of books to help "walk" me through the steps. And we have contacts at two different adoption agencies. Because we will grow our family one way or another. Despite the chaos, we still have more love to give. And who wouldn't want to have these two for sisters?