Thursday, December 14, 2006

Where we get...nowhere

After months of isolation from her team, my boss finally was re-assigned to her previous post...on Fridays. The poor thing is still expected to run a million task forces the rest of the week. So this is good news. Sort of.

At the very least, it enabled me to make a lunch date with her this week (from an invitation sent two months ago) to discuss my options after the baby. We started out talking about how the team had been in her absence, how she was doing, how I was faring, and so on. Then she told me I'd been promoted. All good, even great, things.

But then I asked about the potential for part-time work. Here the clear communication began to falter. My boss honestly explained that the company was undergoing some very large changes and that there was no telling if there'd be any open part-time positions (already quite rare) in six month's time.

The good news is that she didn't deny me outright because of my lack of tenure. The bad news is that I've no clear direction in which to move. I still don't know what I'm going to do, which makes it nearly impossible to go about finding daycare. And all the quality establishments and decent nannies have long waiting lists.

Will I be employed in 2007? Will I be at home?

It's funny that I'd find myself in this position. I'm a Type-A personality, a planner. I applied to one high school. One college. One graduate program. I set my sights and I move. But for the first time I have no plan. And it's scary. What does this mean for me?

Surprisingly, it hasn't sent me into a total panic. But it sits darkly curled up in the back of my mind whispering. And I feel more than a little lost in this place.

4 comments:

pilgrimchick said...

This is an unfortunate inevitability--perhaps it has a lot to do with society at large. There are few good options for proper child care out there for women who wish to continue to work after becoming mothers. My only thought is--have you thought to try and make arragements of some kind with the child's father?

Kat said...

That's a good point, and one I failed to mention. The Banker has a great job, one that has the potential to earn much more than I ever could (despite my additional degrees...grrr). So his is the one job that needs to be kept fulltime, while mine seemed the only one with the potential for an alternative work schedule.

It's just so hard to know what would be the right balance: for the baby, me, our marriage, our future.

Magazine Man said...

Ah yes, I remember this dilemma when we had Thomas. First, Her Lovely Self put Thomas on all the waiting lists of the 4 or so places she liked. The waiting lists had a way of evaporating, though, and we ended up having to choose between 3 places when he was finally old enough to go.

HLS looked into job sharing with another new mom, and if her company hadn't been bought out and her department eliminated while she was on leave, I think that would have worked out. Dunno if it's an option for you.

In the end, HLS went freelance and was able to earn much more than if she'd gone part-time at her old job. Plus she eventually hired a babysitter/nanny to watch Thomas at the house while she worked in the home office downstairs. Worked out well. In fact, it still works out pretty well.

If you want to bounce ideas around, feel free to email me. I know what a crazymaking time this can be, but don't let it overwhelm you to the point that you can't enjoy that about-to-have-a-baby time.

theCallowQueen said...

I hope it works out for you to go part time in the end.

OK, and I'd be a bad daughter if I didn't put in a nanny plug for my mom. She's been a nanny for about a decade.

The little girl she looks after has begun big-girl school, which means fewer work hours for my mom. So if you're looking for someone part time who's great with babies and kids...